I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
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