I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
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