You know your life is awesome when sometimes you walk down the street eating a sandwich and you run into someone you had a threesome with. And not say hi.
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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