Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
