I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
Got a snapchat from Megan last night showing you sobbing about a burrito on the floor with Dan in the background trying not to laugh his ass off
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
