Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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