Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
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