just come out here and I will go home with you...
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
Our 450 pound cab driver smells like McDonalds and sunblock with a touch of vodka. Correction I smell like vodka.
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
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