Me too!
somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
He has the fingertips of a God
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize