Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
I just found a casserole dish in my oven filled with broken glass, blood, and chopsticks. And the REALLY fucked up thing is that finding it answered more questions than it raised.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
Randomize
