You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Randomize
