let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
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