Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
The uberlube is also flammable
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
Randomize