Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
Randomize
