U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
Went to the doctors. She saw my " I love beer" tattoo. All she said was " My drunken tat is of just one word. "Cornnuts.". Then said Mexico was "awesome." And sent me on my way. Yeah. She's my favorite doctor.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
Randomize
