Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
I'm always impressed by your drunken ability to quickly gauge how long it's been since you've shaved and whether or not your prospective hook up will care.
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
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