The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
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