: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
