do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
