There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize
