i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
People with herpes should wear stickers.
it was like eating out sand paper
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
Posting happy birthday to my grandpa on Facebook.... Then realizing my profile pic is me dressed as a slutty cop when he used to be a police officer.
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
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