Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
