I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
