You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight.
oh, you finally did the dishes then?
No, bought new ones.
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
I got you a "sorry you think I'm pregnant" present
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
Randomize
