Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
my roomates packed me a lunch. it had bread, cheesewiz, a can of refried beans and a condom with a note that said "good luck on your first day". im not even gonna pretend to be mad.
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
Randomize
