can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Randomize
