she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
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