my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
Also a shrinking boner emoji would be helpful
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
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