I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
Also, ran into my neighbor across the street. He told me about scheduling his vasectomy. We are officially way beyond the acceptable point for asking his name again.
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
Randomize
