My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
Got drunkdialed by my estranged mom while wallowing in pinkeye drinking 100 proof eating ramen alone. Year summed up perfectly.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Randomize
