She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
Randomize
