Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
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