I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
Randomize
