I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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