he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
Randomize
