Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
Brb crying the tears of my youth
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
Randomize
