Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
Randomize
