oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
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