i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
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