Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
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