Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
Can you repeat that, but with context?
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
Randomize
