Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
i just bought a vibrator and the cashier says "have fun with that." i didnt realise what he said so i responded "you too." and then he gave me his number...
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
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