I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
Randomize
