i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
Can we talk about how i drunkenly changed the timezone on my phone last night and just showed up to work an hour early
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
Randomize
