No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
