Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
Randomize
