He asked me if I "almost moaned"
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
the EMT asked how you broke your nose and you said, "you know, the usual wear and tear."
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
Randomize
