lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
