remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
Be still, my beating vagina.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
Randomize
