I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
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